Wrestling with Resting

Friends, it's been 2 months since my last post. I sorry I didn't let you know ahead of time, but I needed to take a hiatus. To say I've been busy is an understatement. Amongst other things,  work has been stressful and I moved into a new place a couple of weeks ago.

For the first time in what seems like forever, I rested. I came home from Church on Easter Sunday, and laid on the couch for six glorious hours (getting up only to grab another cinnamon roll from the kitchen).

I didn't plan it this way.

When God Interrupts Your Plans

Last week, during my morning commute, I was listening to the one of my favorite radio stations. A woman (let’s call her Jane) called in to share about an experience she recently had.

She began by stating how she woke up late for work and was rushing to get ready. Already 20 minutes late, she was driving down the highway and saw a man on the side of the road. She felt led to pull over, so she did. The man asked to use her phone so he could make a call. Jane hesitantly gave him her cell phone and he proceeded to call 911. As she continued to listen she realized he was calling to report a suicide…his own.

Gaining and Maintaining a Godly Perspective

I absolutely love working with children, but lately it’s been hard. I’ve felt more dread than joy on the days I’m scheduled to serve in my church's nursery. Before each shift I try to press into God’s strength and not rely on my own, but still (at times) I feel overwhelmed.  This past Sunday was no exception.

After a short break between shifts, I arrived back early and decided to listen to worship music. I was singing Here Now by Hillsong United:

Goodbye 2015, Hello 2016

2015 was full of challenges, but what made it memorable was the joy, freedom, and adventure I found in pursuing God and His plan for my life.

I realized it was up to me to live the life I wanted - one I’d fall head over heels in love with. In 2014 I went through a series of life changes that forced me to re-evaluate my priorities and consider what was truly important to me.

The Struggle: Battling Unbelief

Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. - Psalm 42:11

As I sat in my car reading this verse, my eyes filled with tears. "I don’t understand why I feel this way", I thought to myself. How is that I can have so much faith in God’s plan for my life and still struggle with a great amount of fear, doubt and worry? My spirit believes, but there are doubts in mind and fear in heart trying to convince me that this won't work out, it's not going happen for me, it's my fault, and I'm not good enough.

5 Years In: Life In Christ

5 years ago today I made the best decision and most important decision of my life, I became a Christian. The time hasn't flown by, it's actually been equally slow, sweet, frustrating and tumultuous.

I was not raised in church but growing up my parents taught me about God. It wasn't until my junior of college that I finally stopped running from God, and surrendered to His love. As I look over the last 5 years, I cannot believe how much my life has changed, how much I’ve changed.

Trusting God's Timing: 4 Things I've Learned

I am by nature the plan-my-whole-life-before-breakfast type. I trust God and want to follow His plan and timeline for my life. But if I can be honest with you, really honest… some days it’s just plain hard. It’s not until now that I relate to Galatians 6:9 -

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. “

When Things Fall Apart, God can Piece Them Back Together

They say hindsight is 20/20 and the older I get the more I find that to be true. I look back at my life, decisions and circumstances, and I'm amazed at how far God has brought me. A year ago my life looked drastically different in a number of ways. For one thing, I was head over heels in love with a guy I couldn't imagine my life without.

I prayed for things to work out between us, but they continued to fall apart. As I look back on those earnest prayers to God to save the relationship I'm a so grateful the answer was no.

Why I'm Not Ashamed to go Out Alone

As I walked in to the amphitheater I couldn’t help but feel self-conscious. I thought arriving early before the crowd would aid with this, but I was wrong. Everyone was either with a date, a family member, or a group of friends, and I was all alone. That wasn’t my plan, but it was the reality.

With eagerness I  invited friends and acquaintances to join me, but either they weren't available or were disinterested. I soon realized that the only way I would be able to see this show would be to do so unaccompanied.

Seasons Are For Change

’m a few days late, but it’s finally spring and I couldn’t be more excited! Spring is the season of new beginnings. Days are longer, nights are warmer, and things that were once dormant and dead bloom back to life in vibrant color.

Like nature we too experience seasons. There are times in our lives that are filled with warmth, comfort and fun much like summers and times that feel cold like winters due to the loss of a relationship, loved one, or job, or a feeling of loneliness and isolation. For me spring represents a much needed time of joyful change

Fighting for Happiness in the Midst of Pain

I’ve heard it said that happiness is based on what is happening around you. It is an emotion just like sadness, angry, and stress. Happiness can be fleeting if we let it, if we don't take control and fight for it.

Generally, I’m naturally an optimistic person. I see most situations as glass half full, but I’ve also had my fair share of sadness. Over the last 10 years I’ve battled depression for years at a time, both before I was a Christian and after I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. My most recent episode happened about year ago and was my most severe to date. It was in the middle of what seemed like incessant darkness that I decided to make a declaration of how I would

Facing My Greatest Fear: Vulnerability

Most recently, my greatest fear was sharing my blog. Why? Because it requires a certain level of vulnerability, and that scares me to my core. I’ve never been the type of person who talks about their feelings to anyone. I tend to keep things in, partly out fear of judgment and partly because I didn’t believe any else one cared to hear about my problems, fears, and insecurities.

So why go through with it? Let me explain...