Tiffanie Butts

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Why I’m Grateful to be Single

I don’t know about you but it seems like everyone around me is getting married. That's probably an exaggeration, but it definitely feels that way. With every scroll through my Facebook feed and invitation in the mail, I can’t help but wonder when it will be my turn.

Here’s a little background information on my love life. Prior to becoming a Christian, I was the girl who always had a boyfriend. Looking back, it’s not something I’m proud of, but it’s the truth. I liked having someone around to fill the void of loneliness. Now once I became a Christian, I realized I needed to be single. I needed to get to know myself and God without any distractions.

Fast forward to the present, I’ve been single for two and half years now (Yay me!), but it’s not always a walk in the park. There are days where I’m completely content being unattached, and then there are other days, difficult ones when my emotions get the best of me. I begin to feel hopeless about meeting the right guy, and wonder if there’s something wrong with me because I’m still single.

Each time I pray to God for clarity he always gives me the same answer – No! There’s absolutely nothing wrong with me. In His time, He will bring the right person into my life. God sees my desires. He created me and knows me – the real question is - Do I know him?

Do I really believe that he works all things together for my good? That He will give me the desires of my heart if I put my trust in Him? That he is faithful beyond measure? You see, the more I ponder on those things the more I’m reminded of all the amazing ways God shows his love and faithfulness to me.

After college I moved to a new city where I didn’t know anyone. After much prayer, He blessed me to meet women who became more than friends, I consider them soul sisters. I’m sure I never would have found such great people who love and encourage me, and who accept me with all of my quirks and imperfections, without divine intervention.

When I quit my job I took a huge leap of faith knowing that God had something better for me. There were plenty of discouraging moments in that time of unemployment, but eventually I landed a job that surpassed all of my expectations. There wasn’t a single thing I asked for that God didn’t deliver on.

I could go on and on and on about the things he’s given me and how they’re so much better than anything I could ever imagine. Since I know these things are true, why can’t I make myself believe the same about a relationship? That at the right time, as He always does, He’ll give me exactly what I need and more than I could ever hope for. There’s no point in wishing for the future to hurry up and get here. Truth be told, one day I’m going to long for the very thing I’m wishing away.   So instead of letting my emotions, hormones, and Facebook feed get the best of me, I’ll be still.

I've decided to not only embrace being single, but recount the reasons we’re grateful to be single.

That’s right, I said grateful. I’m not striving to just be content in this season; I want to enjoy it to the fullest. Married life will be wonderful in its own right, but it will also be full of different challenges and responsibilities.

Therefore, I will try my best not to take the privileges of singleness for granted. I'm able to be a tad bit selfish, spontaneous, and free to please only myself and God. I have time to know exactly who I am, what I want, and what I don’t. I can dictate my own schedule whether it’s spending hours with God or hours watching Netflix on my day off. I can decorate my entire apartment with hot pink accents (something I’m sure my future husband won’t like).

These may seem like little things, but one day I’ll miss these moments that I’m constantly wishing away. So until I meet my future husband, I’ll rest in knowing that I’m not missing out on anything. I’m exactly where God wants me.

Now this isn’t to say that I won’t have difficult days, because I know I will. But I’ll be ready to remind myself that God makes everything beautiful in His time.